LaMonte Quoted

Alabama 10th in nation in older gay couples

By BOB JOHNSON
Associated Press Writer
April 24, 2004

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Frank Romanowicz and Bob Hill have been a couple for 30 years, living together most of that time in the home they own in Birmingham. The longevity of their relationship amazes some of their straight friends.

"We've had people tell us that we are their heroes and examples because we've been able to stay together for so long despite receiving no support from church and society," Romanowicz said. "We've had more than one person say 'you've been together longer than my two marriages.'"

Romanowicz, 62, and Hill, 64, both retired from the University of Alabama at Birmingham, are not alone in Alabama, a politically conservative, Bible Belt state, where more than 80 percent of legislators have said they support a proposed constitutional amendment to ban gay marriages.

Despite the state's conservative reputation, a new study by the Urban Institute lists Alabama as being 10th in the country in the number of older gay couples, per capita. An older couple is defined as two people 55 or older.

The report was prepared by Gary Gates, a demographer for the Urban Institute, using 2000 Census data, which showed that 8,109 couples in Alabama reported themselves as same-sex unmarried partners, a 658 percent rise from 1990. The rankings for older gay couples were included in "The Gay and Lesbian Atlas," published by the Urban Institute.

With the ongoing controversy over whether gay couples should be allowed to marry, Gates said the atlas provides information concerning the age, occupation and other details about gays.

"There's been an enormous amount of public debate about gay couples and very little information," Gates said.

Gates said same-sex couples face problems not faced by married couples, particularly if one of the partners dies.

"From a policy perspective, not being able to get married has a big impact," Gates said. He said it prevents senior citizens from transferring an estate from one partner to another and "they can't get social security retirement benefits."

Hill said he and Romanowicz have experienced many of the problems that face two people growing old together without the legal benefits of being married.

"When I had two mild strokes, the doctor never talked to Frank about my condition. I told him I would like him to and he never did," Hill said. Because of that experience Hill and Romanowicz have drawn up legal documents that allow them to participate in decisions concerning the care of the other.

Hill said he and Romanowicz also worry about whether they will be able to stay together if one or both needs to move into an assisted-care facility or nursing home.

"Being senior citizens who are gay and retired, the problem we face is that retirement homes won't let you cohabitate. We would have to get two apartments," Hill said.

A constitutional amendment banning gay marriages passed the Alabama Senate 24-1 and is pending in the House. A supporter of that proposed amendment, Alabama Christian Coalition President John Giles, said he's not surprised Alabama would have a large number of older gay couples just because the state is a popular retirement designation "regardless of orientation." But he said he believes it would be wrong for the state to legally recognize these couples with marriage certificates.

"We maintain that marriage is between a man and woman and should be sanctioned accordingly and find little or no room to negotiate that position. Most of the surveys we've done show about 90 percent of Alabamians share that sentiment," Giles said.

After 30 years together, Hill said he and Romanowicz are not worried about being able to get married, but they do want to be treated as a couple.

"We feel blessed that we found each other. We just want the benefits that a heterosexual couple has," Hill said.

Romanowicz said he and Hill often face obstacles over matters that most married couples would find a routine part of daily life, such as how to be listed in their church directory.

"We've even run into the issue of whether Bob and I should have pictures shown together in the church directory. They would not let us be photgraphed together," Romanowicz said.

Integrity Alabama and SPAFER board member Frank Romanowicz was a part of the planning committee and ground team which brought Spong to Birmingham. He said, "I think Spong is important, because, in his efforts to bring about a new reformation, he is challenging the status quo, and he is educating people, in his writings and in his lectures. He is telling the WHOLE story. His exposition of so much of the Bible - errors, omissions, disconnects, his thorough knowledge of the Scriptures is phenomenal."

Romanowicz noted that attendees to the Birmingham event did not include many younger participants.

"There were not many young people there to hear him," he said. "It was mostly the older folks. Not old folks, just holder. It exhibited for me perhaps a disconnect between the under forties and organized religion and the Scriptures."

By David Gary
May 17, 2004

A group of Alabama gay activists were present this evening at the Alabama State House to influence defeat of proposed legislation seeking a state constitutional amendment calling for a ban on same-gender marriage.

According to Ken Baker, board member of Equality Alabama, many hours of behind-the-scenes work took place to prevent the amendment's vote.

"Without all the hard work done by several people, the measure would have certainly passed," Baker said, adding, "It would be entirely incorrect to assume that time ran out and therefore the bill did not come to vote."

Representatives from the newly formed political action committee, the Equality Fund, joined with Equality Alabama members in Montgomery on the 50th anniversary of Brown v Board which coincided with the first gay marriage in Mass.

Howard Bayless, the Alabama State coordinator for the Human Rights Campaign and member of the PAC, reported shortly before 9pm that the issue will not be called for referendum in this fall's November presidential-year election cycle.

"However, it should be noted that in the unlikely event that a special session of the legislature is called by Gov. Riley, we will need to go through this exercise once again to see that this antigay measure does not come up for vote in November," Bayless said.

According to Baker, forces from conservative groups such as the Christian Coalition were also active in the Statehouse.

A number of Integrity members, their families and supporters attended the second annual Day of Equality Awards Banquet in Birmingham this year. Integrity member Patrick Cather was the master of ceremonies for the event.

Each year, Equality Alabama members nominate community leaders for recognition. This year awards were made to nine individuals, several who are or have been involved with Integrity Alabama. Marshall Johnson, immediate past convener, Glenda Elliott and board member Tom Gibbs each received 2003 leadership awards for their efforts in seeking full inclusion.

Table sponsors included friends from Birmingham's Grace Episcopal Church and Integrity Alabama.

Integrity's Convener, Brad LaMonte, has been quoted on three different occasions in The Birmingham News. The articles may be accessed at the following links:

Background: LaMonte's interest in furthering The Episcopal Church on its journey toward full inclusion of LGBT's lead him this past summer(2003) to Minneapolis, Minnesota where along with other like-minded activists he volunteered his services at 'The General Convention of the Episcopal Church.

The convention approved the election of an openly gay person, the Rev. Gene Robinson, to the office of bishop within the church.