Dear Dr. Nucleus,

What's all this about "free radicals?"

Perplexedly,
Crystal

Dear Crystal,

"Free radicals" were a political party formed in the late sixties by a group of dissident Scientists. Taking Tesla as a god, they refused to bathe until he was recognized as such by the Nobel committee in Sweden. Unpopular and unpair-up-able, these laboratory laborers could only unite with themselves; no one else wanted to. They claimed legal rights because they were "unionized." Gullible politicians gave in until some of the saner Scientists pointed out that "unionized" was actually "un-ionized". Following that disclosure, they were denied charge privileges even in their own universities.

Growing older without grant moneys, the radicals eventually sought to reenter the mainstream of Science. Scientists accepted them after the radicals took a vow recognizing no other god than Knowledge. The Free Radical Movement is now but a passing ripple on the river of Scientific thought.

Science shall make you free!
Dr. Nucleus