Dear Dr. Nucleus,

A friend of mine has these questions; can you help her?

Have killer bees been around forever? If so, why has it taken them so long to migrate north? Or are they possibly some type of mutation brought about by the modern day use of insecticides?


(Signed)
A friend in need

Dear Friend,

It is indeed fortunate that you have come to this source for your information.

Killer Bees originally come from Los Angeles, California. They do not migrate quickly because most of their cars are broken or need of a paint job. Those that can drive participate in drive-by stingings, which have resulted in several near-death experiences. Flaunting every social insect norm, these degenerate “Bee-boppers” go to Bee movies with their promiscuous Bee girls clinging to one of their six arms.

Did Science have a hand in their production? Sad to say, No! Instead of being cleanly mutated by insecticides, they are a tragic consequence of single-parent hives. These are Mother Nature's latchkey kids.

Hope this clears the air,
Dr. Nucleus