Long Lankin
(A morality play for the salvation of souls)


Truthfully writ by Sir Balthazar of Endor (mka J. Ellsworth Weaver)

Beware the moss, beware the moors, beware of Long Lankin
Be sure that the shutters are barred lest Lankin should get in.

Players (in order of appearance, not in order of importance)

Lord Weary - a Norman-English lord and knight, advanced in years but not wisdom
Lankin - a stonemason, a Saxon
Nurse - caretaker of baby Johnson Weary, midwife, said to be skilled in herbal lore
Johnson Weary - infant child of Lord and Lady Weary, sole heir
Devil(s) - ghastly phantasm of souls set upon duality and "Free Will", advocates for anarchy
Lady Weary - Lord Weary's young, French wife, mother to Johnson, Lady of House Weary
Bailiff - stout man and true servant of the lawful rulers of the Realm
Angel of the Lord - as may we all become

Setting - The moors outside of Castle Weary

(Lord Weary approaches center stage)

Lord Weary
Where is that of which I have need?
My fingers from the cold must bleed.
That peasant said it was this way.
He must think that I have all day.
Lankin! Lankin! Lankin! Lankin!

(Lankin enters carrying mallet)

Lankin
What is that sound? Some kettles clankin'?
What is that shape upon my moor?
Some ghastly death comes to my door?
Aroint thee spirit of the night,
My mallet good shall give thee flight!

(Lankin and Lord Weary recognize each other, Lankin hides mallet behind his back)

Lord Weary
Lankin! That you? Are you all right?

Lankin
Milord! You did give me a fright!

Lord Weary
In sooth I sought thee 'bout my tower.

Lankin
You had me make it for a bower
To house your lady, new-won wife.
It has not leaked? Swear on your life.

(Lankin grabs Lord Weary by his collar)

Lord Weary
Nay, nay, nay, nay, my good workman
I give my hoarse voice e'er I can:
Your tower stands so good and tall
We wish its twin upon our hall.
Can you have done by Whitsuntide?

Lankin
Aye, a snug warm tower for your bride.
You wish for me to start at once?

Lord Weary
Nay, do not start nor play the dunce.
Milady is deliv'red of child
The sweet young thing must have air mild
Not split with hammers' violent ring.
Chip not on stone while small birds sing.
A child of mine will be a prize
'Twill 'tract his share of env'ous eyes.

Lankin
See now if I scope this aright:
You wish for me to work at night?

Lord Weary
Nay, not at night that is not best.
For how could Lady and I rest?
I say you only pick some hour
When Johnson dear has quit his bower.
If you can build the tower tall
The purse of mine shall have you all.

(Weary shows large purse with many coins to Lankin)

Lankin
I am your man though still I muse
What more than sleep shall I now lose?

(They make motions in the air to describe the tower. They exit)

(Enter Nurse carrying Johnson)

Nurse
Baby Johnson now be quiet,
Thy siren screams could start a riot.
Hush young master, please be still
Just like thy da' you'll get your will.
For five long years I've served your da'
Without herbcraft I'd be your ma.
But he has found some new French flow'r
To keep within his hothouse bower.
I'll scrub his floors and make his bed
But ne'er will I with Weary wed.

(Lankin reenters and continues to mime tower construction)

(Nurse notices Lankin from the rear)

Nurse
But what is this: a god or man?
Look you, ladies, his shoulder span!
And other things…don't take this odd,
A man like that might sport a cod.
A fish I meant, you are quite ev'l.
With such a man I'd shame the devil.
Lie down here on this table, boy
Whilst Auntie Nurse should seek some joy.

(Nurse puts Johnson down on a table)

(Devils appear. Neither Nurse nor Lankin notice. They are looking at each other. Devils pull and push them together; Devils arranges hands and legs. Eventually Nurse and Lankin walk off. Devil picks up and plays with Johnson. Devil exits with Johnson.)

(Devil carries sign "IV Months Pass" around so all can read.)

(Lord Weary and a Devil enter)

Lord Weary
My tower's twin is done at last
And hard upon us the time has passed.

(Weary listens to the Devil who whispers in his ear)

I'll find some fault; contract will break
Lankin will not my fat purse take.
I'll pay him less but still his due.
He is base-born and cannot sue.

(Lankin enters)

Lord Weary
Lankin, man come take your pay
I must for London soon away.

(Lord Weary hands Lankin a very few coins in a small bag)

Lankin
This is not fair, this is not right.
Lord, I worked most day and night.
I did not child wake nor stir.
The tower's done; please pay me sir!

Lord Weary
The tower's done but for a flaw:
The silver mantels that you saw
Are not installed nor are they here.
Light cannot wait another year.
Your work is flawed; your work is done
So take your cash; don't wake my son.

(Lankin takes the bag and pours the few coins out. Lord Weary bows to the audience. Lankin tosses coins at Weary. Lord Weary picks up coins and exits.)

(Enter Nurse and Devil apparently conversing. Devil gestures lewdly.)

Nurse
Lankin, why such sad demeanor?
Weary's paid you; let's buy dinner.
Afterward we'll have dessert
Love's sweet honey will ease all hurt.

Lankin
He played me false; he paid me light --
We'll sup on naught but love tonight.
What kind of trick can get my due?
God may not know but what say you?

(Devils nod and pull both Nurse and Lankin together. Muttering and shocked "No!s" come from the huddle. Finally, all emerge. Lankin and Nurse look determined. Devils look very happy. All exit.)

(Enter Lord and Lady Weary)

Lady Weary (French accent optional)
Why must we stand out in the cold
To talk in twain the hour's old.
You now must go to London town.
Please bring to me some nice white gown.
You said you had some tale for me.
Pray tell me quick and let it be.

Lord Weary (slowly, almost singing)
Beware of Long Lankin who lives on the moors.
Beware of Long Lankin who lives on the gorse.
Beware the moss, beware the moor
Beware of Long Lankin.
Be sure the doors are bolted well
Lest Lankin should creep in.

(Lord and Lady Weary exit)

(Enter Lankin, Devils and Nurse separately)

Lankin
Where is the master of the house?

Nurse
Off to London, the dirty louse!

Lankin
Where is the lady of the house?

Nurse
In her tower, his little mouse!

Lankin
Where does young Johnson Weary lie?

Nurse
In his cradle where he will die!

(Nurse picks up Johnson from off stage)

Lankin & Nurse (chanting)

We will pinch him, we will prick him, we will stab him with a pin
And the nurse shall hold the basin for the blood all to run in

(Nurse grabs basin from Devil. Lankin has a knife & Nurse a large pin. They mime stabbing Johnson. Red ribbons stream into the basin. Johnson is put in basin.)

Lankin (calling off stage)
Lady come down the stairs to me!

Lady Weary (from off stage)
The way is dark I cannot see.

Lankin
You have two silver mantles bright
Use them both to give you light.

(Lady Weary enters carrying candlestick(s), sees Johnson in basin, is set upon and stabbed by Nurse and Lankin)

Nurse & Lankin (chanting)

There was blood all in the kitchen
There was blood all in the hall
There was blood all in the parlor
Where my lady she did fall

(Lady Weary falls to the floor and Devils spread red cloth over her)

(Nurse, Lankin, and Devils exit. They carry the candlestick(s) as prize. Nurse and Lankin find a place to sit in sight in the audience. They pretend nonchalance)

(Lord Weary enters)

Lord Weary
Merciful God! Who's done this deed?
The bailiff's hand we surely need.
Where is the nurse; is she away?

(Bailiff enters)

Bailiff
We'll find the truth e'r break of day.

(Lady Weary with red cloth draped over her, carrying basin and Johnson, exits)

(Devils point out Lankin and Nurse to Bailiff)

(Bailiff returns leading Lankin and Nurse tied by wrists to rope)

Bailiff
Here are the two what done the deed.
Let's execute them with great speed.

(Bailiff unties rope from Lankin and slips noose around Lankin's neck. Lankin holds noose up to simulate being hanged.)

(Bailiff then leads Nurse to "fire hoop". Devils and Bailiff raise fire hoop around her.)

(Enter Angel of the Lord – Lady Weary with wings and halo – carrying Johnson)

(Lord Weary collapses with grief and dies)

Angel of the Lord (speaking VERY clearly)
Good gentles all, I'll end this tale.
God's peace, you see, is very frail.
When gentlemen refuse to pay
Their due, the Dev'l has his way
When Adam delved and Eve did spin,
Who then were the gentlemen?

(Devil carries around a sign "The End")

© 1996 J. Ellsworth Weaver All Rights Reserved