(Note from Ann: Beckie DeYoung has asked me to send the following email in response to all the questions addressed to her following her email announcement of her resignation. This is based on a letter that she sent answering one member's questions. )

Hello Sharon,

Thank you for your note asking why I resigned and the disappointment that you expressed. I think the bigger question is not why did I resign but why did I withdraw my resignation.

I don't have a quick, simple answer to your question of "Why did I resign?". As I said in the message that Ann sent out for me, it was a decision made after many tears and sleepless nights. I saw several issues that I perceived as fiduciary responsibility that I was very concerned about but didn't feel I could personally impact while on the Board. Beyond that, I was concerned about the direction that this board was taking towards micromanagement of the corporation. I felt that the extent of leadership shown and the lack of information shared over the recent issues and the new direction were problems.

I also was uncomfortable with what appeared to me to be a desire to dismantle and reassemble some of the foundations that the Corporation was built upon. What I saw as the down playing of the need to include the segment referred to as the "down staters" (which seems to be the term that is replacing trunk slammers) was unacceptable to me. On some, if not all, of these points I felt like I would only be hitting my head against the wall if I did not resign and no attention would be brought to these issues.

I did not reach the decision to resign easily or quickly. It was something that had build up over time and especially over the past four to six weeks. I believe this initial decision was based on knowledge -- knowledge of issues that I was very concerned about; knowledge that the wrong direction that I feared we were taking would have a negative impact on the community; knowledge that there is very little that I could expect to personally do about them; knowledge that any battles would be very draining emotionally and require a tremendous amount of my time (something I have too little of already); knowledge that sometimes the only way to draw attention to such matters is to take a drastic action like resigning. As an engineer, I made my living making decisions based on knowledge. However, after agonizing for the last couple days over requests from the membership that I reconsider my resignation, I was also disappointed -- and angry -- with myself for walking away, even if it was walking away from battles that I felt I could not win. After all, you don't know what the results would really be until you try.

I have now reconsidered my action, gone back to the Board and have been appointed to fill out the remainder of the term that I had vacated. The second decision to rescind the resignation recognized that the above knowledge didn't change. However, it was a decision based on emotions -- frustration over the situations that led to the resignation; anger at myself for not having the tenacity to follow through in a difficult situation; disappointment in myself for not following through on a commitment that I had made; feeling that resigning betrayed people who counted on me to stick it out for them; distaste for leaving a job uncompleted; deep concern about the challenges ahead for the Board and how it was going to address them; hope that I may be able to have a positive impact on the Board's decisions and actions; belief that if you don't take a stand either for a position that you support or against one that you oppose you are a part of the problem; desire to be part of the solution and not a part of the problem; pride in our community and being a part of that community; belief in the goodness of people and that the members of the Board care about the welfare of the community even when I strongly disagree with them on some issues and on how to best serve the community.

So what was the right decision? I'm not sure that I'll ever know but I'm betting a tremendous amount on the second decision.

Beckie DeYoung

Ron Emerson
Ron@clpoc.org (Ron@CLPOC.org)