First Reflection

As stated in the Brochure, we are going to be reflecting upon the theme: Seeing others as God’s gift to us, and trying to be God’s gift in turn to others. That theme is appropriate at this time of year because we are celebrating the Birth of Jesus, who sums up in Himself every possible good thing, and who has been given to us as a gift from His eternal Father. Surely, that is one of the reasons why we exchange gifts at this time of year.

But before we begin to reflect more specifically upon the theme, and consider the various categories of “others” that we encounter during the course of our lives, let us consider briefly what we mean by “gift”. I am not suggesting that we don’t know what a gift is, I merely wish to bring to our conscious attention some of the things we know about gifts in a kind of subconscious way, or at least a non-verbal way.

To get a comprehensive notion of “gift”, I think we do well to consider the Latin word that is used, or was used to convey our current day notion of gift because that word is so rich in meaning that it helps us to see facets of the concept of gift that otherwise might not come to our attention.

That word in Latin is “gratia”, which we also translate as “grace” and “favor” as well as “gift”. Of course, as the word Gratia came to be used in the Church and in Catholic Theology, it had a very technical meaning: It meant a very special and specific “gift” of God to every person who is baptized into the Faith. That very special gift is a created participation in the Being and activity of God Himself. The gift that enables us to share in the being of God by created participation is called Sanctifying Grace, and the gifts that enable us to share in the operations or activity of God are called actual graces. Sanctifying Grace makes us children of God by adoption, it makes us members of God’s Personal Family, and the actual graces can be compared to powers and faculties of our humanity, out of which we move and act.

But we want to think of “gratia” or grace in a non technical way; Thus we must consider the other equally important meaning that it has, and that is translated by our word “favor”. But the meanings gift and favor are not unrelated. Gift is a subdivision of the meaning of “favor”. That is to say: every gift is a favor, but not every favor is a gift. There is one use of the word “favor” though that does mean a very special kind of gift, and you are all familiar with it. For example, if we go to a banquet or to a dinner party, the host or hostess always puts a “favor” at the place of each of the guests. It is always some little gift that can be taken home and kept as a souvenir, a remembrance of the dinner party. A good example is the “favor” that was put at everyone’s place at the 50^th anniversary party of religious vows of a cousin of mine. It was a little gold-colored basket with a gold covered imitation rose in it. I still have it in my room.

The reason why “favor” has a wider meaning than gift, although all gifts are “favors”, is that some favors are physical things, objects, which have their own separate existence. Other “favors are either intangible or, if tangible, and perceptible by the senses, they are transient, and these would include the “favors” we do for people, or the “favors” which other people do for us. The favors, which have their own separate existence, are called generally “gifts”, whereas we retain the word “favor” for what is not.

In any event, because a gift is a favor, like every favor it is something given us which we do not deserve. That is to say, we have not earned it, nor is it “owed” to us in strict justice. Also, we can never speak of gift or favor without conveying the idea that some other person is involved or associated with the gift or favor. Because every gift or favor is not merited, it comes to us out of the generosity of the one who gives the gift or does us the favor. Therefore, every gift and favor has its origin and source in the charity or the love of that person who bestows them upon us. Thus, we see that since we cannot disassociate the concept of another or others from the concept of gift, there is nothing illogical or unreasonable about associating the concept of “gift” with others.

Furthermore, because the notion of gift and favor are inseparable from the notion of charity or Love, then it is impossible to separate the notion of “gift” and “favor” from God, since God is LOVE. God, then, is the ultimate source of all gifts and favors. We should try to get into the habit of seeing every good thing that we have in our lives and our relationships as being gifts or favors from God. We can acquire that habit by realizing that we have not done anything basically, to earn or merit all the good things and people, and experiences that fill up our personal lives. Once we destroy the suggestion that comes from Pride that people “owe” us the good things we receive from them, and then we can see all good things as coming from God, the source of all gifts. We can even begin to see that especially the people in our lives are given to us by God, because only God could have created the human race. This certainly justifies the theme of these reflections. Others are God’s gift to us, He does us a favor in giving us others, and yes He wants us to be His gift to others as well. Then the truth of the statement of St. Paul echoed by Therese – “Everything is a grace”. Yes, everything God puts in our lives is GRACE AND FAVOR AND GIFT.

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