Ode to Technology

by john valley

Things,
beauteous things

Washers and dryers and microwaves
Toasters and roasters and stereo
How would I ever get through the day
Without a walkman radio

I don’t need God
I need a repairman!
I don’t need Love
I need a good salesman!

I got my
     quadraphonic stereo modular surround-sound cable ready
    home theater unit
     to keep me company

I got my triple-rated videos and vibrators and wicked wicked toys
and there ain’t no risk of stds with these
like there is with stupid boys

I worked all day and shopped till I dropped
and now I need some eats
but there ain’t much time
an’ I don’t need sublime

I’m cruisin’ the city for a drive-in restaurant

it’s got long lines and the food’s not hot
but it’s quick and it’s cheap and it’s all I got
my gas is low and I hope I make it
O God won’t you get me to the drive-in restaurant

When life was simple and you knew what to do
there wasn’t much but people near to you
But I don’t care for people
You can hang ‘em from a steeple
for all’a me
and that’s just history...
I got things to set me free

Things,
beauteous things
I got things to set me free

come sit by the fire
with molly and dwyer
and lets talk of things that we desire

I got my car (it’s really wunderbar)
but it’s much too old, the a/c won’t get cold
and it needs a new front tire—
let it go

I’m going to get a new one
a bright and shiny new one
to sit in my front yard
with options and accessories
and all the luxuries
who cares about the payments if they’re hard

I got a microwave with features quite sublime
It doesn’t work right, though
the door is broke and there’s no chime
it’s time to get a new one--
let it go

O God, I love these things
I work all day and dream all night
of how to pay the credit cards
because I know these things
Will make my life just right

Things, beauteous things
The things that love me, in the night
The things that make my life just right

I got things to set me free