ORIGINAL POETRY - PAGE 2

DREAMS

There must be a reason for dreams,
For the endless searching
Which controls my life.
I try to tell myself
That there is nothing to be found,
And yet, there is no desire to cease.
If there were no dreams,
Nothing to strive for,
What would be the reason for me? (02-16-91)

ETERNITY

Eternity seemed such a short span of time
When I thought there was a chance of spending it with you
...sharing your hopes and dreams
...resisting your fears
...basking in the soft, warm glow of your friendship.
But now there is only the thought of spending eternity without you
...alone
...distant from the eyes which imprisoned me
...torn from those strong, gentle arms which once held me close.
I could bear any pain, any torture, any punishment
Except an eternity without your love,
Except an eternity without you. (5-30-95/teh)

EXISTENCE

Through the chill of a lonely room
I feel your strength.
It seems to permeate the hidden recesses of my soul,
warming them, gently caressing them.
There was no life,
no true and beautiful life for me until you came.
There was only my sad existence. (10-87)

THE FIGHT OF LIFE

As night falls in the land of Yor
And the people retire to their homes,
The fires are lit and the people rest
But the forest surrounds, and the beast roams.

The people cower in closets and corners,
And say prayers to God that He might
Send them a hero to rid them of fear,
And give them the power to fight.

You see, aeons ago the land abounded
With happiness galore,
But now the joy once known by the people
Resides only in ancient tales of lore.

The beast ascended from the pots of Hell
One dark and dreary night,
To take victims and steal the souls
Of those who now cringe with fright.

Resistance to this creature was all but none,
For his power was far greater than they.
Now all is left to chance whom he'll devour tonight,
And all they can do is pray.

Unknown to the people, this night was different
Fate had run its course,
And out of the emptiness came a hero
Bearing a power to match the demon's force.

He rode for days to find the place
Where stands eternal night,
To destroy the demon and return
To the people the life-giving light.

As the darkness grew deeper
He knew it would not be long
Til this evil was forever purged
And good returned to its rightful throne.

A foul stench fill the air
And our hero was taken aback
As he beheld the creature and saw
That no evil force could he lack.

"I've come for you,"
Cried the hero aloud,
And around the demon
Came his impish crowd.

"He's mine," cried the creature
In a voice that reeked of death.
"Let no man interfere, lest he wish
To join my minions in an undead rest."

The battle raged,
The hours tuned to days,
Yet our hero never faltered,
Never did he stray.

As the battle raged on
The picture grew grim.
Evil, it seemed, was beginning to win
At the creature's demonic whim.

Our hero was struck a mortal blow
But the people's prayers grew stronger
And they seemed to lift him a little higher
And carry him just a bit longer.

The creature's hold seemed to dissipate,
The sky began to lighten,
As evil's hold began to slip
And the hold of good began to tighten.

The weapons were wielded
And the battle was won
At last the people were once again free
And warmed by the light of the sun.

But our hero was never to taste victory,
Only sweet repose in death.
But his memory is never far from heart or mind,
And the people say he never really left.

A bit of hero lies in each of us
As we champion the cause of good.
Each battle we are sure to will
If to believe in ourselves we would.
Light and darkness, good and evil
In the same place cannot reside.
It is better to fight and face a defeat
Than to turn from our fears and hide.

Goodness and honor, valor and truth
Will forever be victorious,
And those who will fight for what is right
Will forever be remembered as heroes, and glorious. (summer'86)

FLOWERS

Moments with you, I spend,
Gathering memories like flowers...
To press between the pages of my mind.
To live again...
When you are gone from me. (03-11-88)

FREEDOM?

I have always heard the trite little phrase that "a picture speaks a thousand words".
How I wish that were true.
How I wish, that just once more,
I could hear the volumes that were spoken within your eyes,
feel the strength of your arms as they both crushed and caressed me,
breathe you in as you stole my breath away.
Your soul lay as open to my explorations as did your body;
and what I discovered there was more hauntingly beautiful
than any I shall ever know again.
How many lifetimes have been lived in those eyes?
...I wonder...
How many unsuspecting fools have lost their souls to the power of your smile?
I feel as though I have been bound,
chained body and soul,
and yet, the only freedom I wish
is to be held closer, tighter,
locked away inside your heart forever.
I'm being torn apart.
The pain is too great to bear alone.
You must feel that rejection would solve everything.
Push her away she's getting too close.
Too late, my friend.
You opened your heart to mine
...whether intentional or not.
You touched.
You felt.
You wanted.
You received.
Push away my body if you must;
but you will never be free of my heart.
You will carry inside you forever the passion, the hunger, the desire...the love of my soul.
You will be free of me, oh yes,
...but will you ever be free of your own hunger,
...of the passions, the desires of your own soul?
Will you ever be free of yourself? (5-16-95/the)

...IF ONLY THERE WAS HOPE

You really played me for a fool didn't you?
You plucked my feelings
like the strings of a harp
and pounded my heart
like an old base drum.
I hope is was worth it to you.
I hope the sacrifice of my self-respect,
my pride,
the final drops of my self-esteem
were worth whatever it is that you are receiving,
now that you've pushed me aside.
I've been honest with you from the start.
Even when my better judgement said "keep silent",
my heart wouldn't let me.
I have endured so much that you will never know
for this tiny blossom of friendship
I thought was budding between us.
I would endure whatever is to come
...if only there was hope. (5-16-95/teh)

HOPELESS WISHES

How can I convey to you
The meaning of my love?
The depth it possesses?
The strength in the arms that reach out to you now?
You seem so sure that it can never be,
But never is a long time,
And my patience is wearing thin.
How much longer can I withhold
My feelings...my true feelings?
I feel with each facade
To decay in spirit a bit more.
When will you look beyond the mask
I am forced to wear?
When will you tear down the walls
That protect me and keep me safe?
When will you hear the words I am
Not saying?
The unspeakable, unbearable,
Relentless words that I could not bring
Myself to speak.
Please, search your heart,
Know your feelings
And try to understand what in this life
I cannot convey. (07/86)

HOW COULD IT BE

How could it be that I have come so far in life, and yet
I have such a long way to go?
How could it be that I have gained so much in my lifetime
But still my possessions are few?
How could it be that I have so many friends when I'm laughing
But when my tears begin to fall they hurry to depart?
Which is the greater...To be wealthy in possessions or wealthy in knowledge?
If I had my life to live over again,
There are many things I would change.
Instead of seeing the tarnished side of life's coin, I would simply turn it over
And view only the happiness and serenity of God's boundless creation.
But why do I sit and mull these things over in my mind?
Even now I realize, one is never too old to change one's life for the better. (12/'86)

TO IMAGINE

To imagine is to reach the unobtainable,
Touch the untouchable,
And to grasp all boundless concepts.
To imagine is to be free.
Free to explore the far reaches of your mind,
Free to be that which you have always dreamed of being,
And free to possess that which you feel you could never have.
To imagine is to live. (06/86)

LESSONS IN LOVE

How well we learn
As we grow older,
That some people find love
And others grow colder.

Finding true love
Is difficult to undertake,
But love must be achieved
For one's own sake.

We learn many lessons
Throughout our lives,
We learn through hello's
We learn through goodbye's.

The most important fact
In a relationship,
Is to know that presents aren't tokens of promise
And sometimes our love will slip.

But as we amble on
Through life's aimless path
We search for a love
That's sure to last.

We take each moment as it comes to pass
Each blow we takes as its dealt
And we learn no one will ever truly love us
Until we can truly love ourselves. (07/86)

THE LIGHT OF YOU

I sit alone now, in solitude
...in darkness.
Gazing out my window,
I witness Heaven's tears
Falling gently to earth,
The low rumbling of the thunder
Competes with the thundering...
Pounding...relentless drumming of my heart.
A sound which knows no limits
As it echoes across the barren wasteland of my soul.
A sound that reverberates time and again
Through the blackened tunnels and chambers of my mind.
It cries out for solace, for comfort.
It cries out for you.
I wonder how much longer my blinded heart
Must wait for the light it so desperately needs.(07-03-89/bab)