ORIGINAL POETRY - PAGE 5

PLANT A DREAM

Dreams are the seeds we planted yesterday...
Which sprout into our character today...
And flower into the destiny of our tomorrow's.

HEART OVER MIND

No matter what the mind thinks it knows...
and no matter what words of denial
it speaks through the mouth...
The heart will forever know the truth.

WISDOM

True wisdom does not always lie
in the ability to hang onto a situation,
with the intentions of making it work,
But in the ability to know when to let go.

THE VOICE

There's a voice that calls from the ends of the earth,
A voice which I cannot ignore.
It calls to the room I keep locked in my heart,
It holds the key to open the door.

The strength of that voice is my weakness,
The purity of it, my sin.
The gentleness of it is brutal,
The brutality I must have again.

The voice which burns inside my head
Each time I close my eyes,
Is matched in timbre only
By the longing of my sighs.

The voice of my redemption,
The voice of my release,
The voice of my temptation,
The voice of inner peace.

It seems I never get enough,
And yet almost too much.
There is no price too great to pay
For one more word, one look, one touch.

If I could never again experience
Perfection in a sunrise,
I would be content forever
With the memory of your eyes.

If I could never again touch
The gentle contours of lace,
I would treasure all that I have felt
From the sweet smile on your face.

If I never heard another note
My soul would still rejoice,
As forever my heart will remember
The beguiling sound of your voice.

SIT AND SPIN

I never guessed my life could be
As wonderful as this.
For when I stopped running and turned around
You met me with a kiss.

A kiss that seemed yo last at least
Forever and a day;
And yet too soon, it seemed to me,
That kiss was taken away.

A kiss that left me breathless;
There were no words to speak.
A kiss that haunts every waking hour,
And allows no repose in sleep.

If truth be known then I must say
I knew it could not be.
For you are one who only longs
To live, to love and be free.

But it seems that I always hope beyond hope
That maybe soon you will find,
The one you thought would lead you forward
Has left you far behind.

And if by chance my hopes prove true
Any you declare that you want me once more,
Rest assured that when you knock.
I will surely open the door.

But please don't expect what we once had
To happen again overnight.
For my heart has dwelt so long in darkness,
So long without your love's light.

My vow to you is to continue to do
All for you that I can.
But if you ever try and use me again...
Baby, you can sit and spin!!!!!

SILENT TRUTHS

I watch as our lives unfold,
day by day.
Moments I cherish
and store away in my heart
are replayed countless times in my dreams.
I watch you when you can't see me,
when you can't read my eyes.
It has been said in various ways,
that eyes reveal the secrets of the heart,
therefore you must never be allowed
to view the doorways of my soul.
For too much emotion is trapped there,
too much desire is harbored there,
and to release it would mean certain death.
To voice my feelings,
to allow you access
to the understanding of my secret dreams
would be to face the possibility of losing you
...forever.
As it stands,
at least I have the precious moments
of soft spoken words and light-hearted joviality,
of fleeting glances,
and painful retreats.
Until the day when courage mounts up on hallowed wings
and I throw all sense of pride and caution to the wind,
I shall but remain
on the outer boundary of your life.

THE NIGHTMARE OF REALITY

Last night,
In the warm stillness of an empty moonless sky,
I felt your thoughts.
I felt your arms reaching out for me
Across the miles between us.
I felt you drawing me near,
Protecting me from the pain of separation,
Loving me.
Time and distance could no longer
Dictate limitations upon our relationship.
We had transcended the boundaries of this world
And stepped across the threshold of our world
...the world we created together
...the world of our dreams.
In that sweet stillness
Of my midnight dreams
There was no one in the world
But you.
There were no situations to consider
...no right or wrong
...only you.
Why then must I always wake
From those beautiful dreams
To face the nightmare of morning
...the nightmare of reality
...the cold, uncaring, unfeeling breaking
Of the dawn of each new day without you?
When will the dream of you become the reality of us?

TO SWIM AGAIN

I feel truly lost without you.
Like the best part of myself is missing.
Fair?
Yes, I suppose one could consider this form
of punishment fair.
After all, it was probably I who frightened you away.
Though we are together physically
There is a gulf which runs deeply between us.
Countless times I have tried to cross over,
to no avail.
Insurmountable?
Possibly. Only you can decide.
Confusion reigns supreme at this moment.
How can I be so sure of one aspect of my life
Yet desire something so totally different?
Surrender?
Never! If you are to defeat me
and the purpose for which I was sent,
The battle will not be easily won.
Hatred...
Anger...
Rejection...
Fear...
These which make up the gulf, rip away at my soul like piranha
Stripping the flesh from my bones each time I try to cross.
Hope...
Compassion...
Desperation...
Love...
These which make up my heart,
Bear me up as a raft and give me the strength...To Swim Again.

SOON

10:24. I lie here, restless,
Thinking of you.
Sleep evades all efforts.
I concentrate solely on tomorrow and all it holds.
I'll see you, tomorrow.
Tomorrow, I'll see your smile, hear your voice,
Feel your arms around me.
Tomorrow...tomorrow...tomorrow...
It seems as though I have waited
A thousand tormenting years for tomorrow.
And still it is endless hours away.

11:02. The clock moves so slowly.
The compensation of memories created together is weak.
Yet I cling to the hope they evoke.
The walks...
Talks...
Smiles...
Laughter...
All shared, enjoyed together,
Are the ingredients which now make up my dreams.
But soon there will be more dreams.
More dreams from which to birth reality.

11:59. Only one minute separating me from happiness.
Sixty seconds more of anguish.

12:00. Time no longer procrastinates.
The inevitable has come to pass.
Tomorrow is now today.
Soon...

SO ALONE

I watch you.
Not only with my eyes,
but also with my heart.
It beats in time with yours.
Once I was so sure of your feelings.
You even admitted you loved me,
and now,
there is barely any civility
in the tone of your voice.
What force is ripping at the bond of friendship
which has been formed?
Even though you are standing here
next to me, telling me nothing's changed,
saying "everything's ok",
you might as well be a million miles away
for all the distance between us.
The pain I feel at this moment
is so great that sometimes I feel me heart will burst.
I would probably feel better if it did.
God, why do I always end up being hurt so badly?
All I ever dreamed of was a special friend.
A friend to share with, a friend to care with,
to have fun with...to love.
Why are people so afraid to let me love them?
Do I seem such a truly horrible person?
Am I so terrible?
I thought this time,
finally this time,
I had found a very special friend
who would make the pain go away.
But, he turned out
just as superficial and shallow
as all the rest
and the hurt now just seems
all the more vivid!
I don't have anyone, now.
God, I feel so alone!

THE DESIRE OF MY SOUL

I pray I NEVER awaken from this dream of you!
O 'twould be the desire of my soul.
To e're awaken daily in your arms
Until time stands still and we are no more.

TIME

Time spent with you...
Your voice caressing my soul,
Pouring over me like
The waters of some ancient pool;
The life-giving primordial pool
From which first sprang the
Very essence of the divine
I so adore in you.
I listen to the sweet, dulcet tones
In the words which fall from your lips,
Like gentle showers of leaves
From autumn trees, and I marvel
At the dream of you so recently
Having become reality to my heart.
How is it possible, I wonder.
What have I ever done, said, thought, felt
To deserve you, perfect you?
How can I ever repay the gods for their kindness?