There is perhaps only one word that can describe Lewis. I doubt that my mind can generate such horrible of a word. I'll work on it. Until then, enjoy the following Lewis Mini-Stories. These are perhaps some of the best, most classic Lewis moments out there.

"The Noise Fiasco"
by Michael

Lewis enters the room. Without any prompting by us whatsoever, the first thing that comes out of his mouth is: "Alright. The place I normally study at is closed. So all of you better be quiet. I don't want any fucking noise. No Nintendo, no video games, no music. All of you assholes better shut the fuck up." We were not going to let Lewis boss us around. We mentioned to Lewis that quiet hours were not in effect. He said, "Well don't you have exams to study for?" We said no. I mentioned to the fat asshole that we are three people and he is only one. We are the majority in the room. We live in the room, he does not. To this, Lewis responded: "I don't care about you three. I don't care id there were a hundred of you. I don't give a fuck if there were a billion of you snotty little geeks against me. No noise? Got it!?" We pretty much told Lewis that we would do what we wanted and he slammed his door. We then went and talked to our RA and filled out an incident report form. Oh and by the way, during this whole confrontation, I was wearing my snazzy Lewis Log shirt (I have the police runner one). I wonder what he was thinking...

"Lewis The Fuck"
By John

Random moments of Lewis...

Well when I got back from getting some dinner he was here. And the first thing he asks me is "What shit have you been pouring down my sink?". What the hell? Nothing. Then he asks if I pissed in his sink because it smells bad. Then he asks if maybe Michael did and I said no. And he said he couldn't imagine Brian doing that.

And then he asks me to look up the procedure on how to take down a flag. He said he saw an american flag waving near the student center. And according to Leiws, really you're not supposed to have a flag up after dark without a light on it. So he wants to go take it down, and asks me to come. Isaid no. But he went anyways, and he has it now. and he keeps going on about how the police are fucking retards.

Well after the whole Noise Fiasco, all three of us have decided that if Lewis is still "living" here next semester, we will not live here. University housing is giving us the shaft in this whole situation, so we are taking our complaints higher up. Lewis has got to go.

After a long hiatus, we are finally back. Lately Lewis has not been up to anything, but just the other night while I was working on the second twig animation, I got a call on my room phone. No one ever calls me on my room phone, not to mention it was 3:30 AM. I answered the phone, to hear the voice of Lewis. He didn't sound right. Here is the conversation, as I remember it:

"Hey Michael, this is Lewis. Remember a while back I told you that if you were ever in a tight spot, I would help you out?"
"Yeah I guess..."
"Well now I am in the need of your help."
"What have you done now?"
"I'm in jail again. And I need you to get me out"
"Oh my God."
"Yeah, you need to drive down here, pick up my wallet, go to the ATM, withdraw eight hundred dollars, drive back here, and fill out some paperwork then I can go."

At this point I was faced with a moral dilemma. Help Lewis or Not?

"Well Lewis, I don't think I can help."
"What?!"
"You see, my car has been acting up lately. And withdrawing money from an ATM in a bad part of town with a car that does not always work would put me in a dangerous position."
"So what, just come down here and get me out. Borrow someone else's car."
"No Lewis. I'm not going to put myself in danger to get you out of jail."
"So what am I supposed to do?"
"I don't know." [i hang up]

Now some of you will think that the decision I made is a bad one. But think about it. My car really does have problems. It's very early in the morning in a dangerous part of town. Second of all, this is the 2nd or 3rd time that Lewis has been in jail this semester. Perhaps his staying in jail will help him to reflect upon his own problems. I am finally to the point when I want to get Lewis out of my life. It's really horrible living in a dorm with a person whom you dislike, and furthermore you never know when he will show up. I just want Lewis to leave. He needs some time by himself to realize that his has a problem. Lewis will not accept that he has a problem, yet he displays all of the classic signs of a schizophrenic. Read this [taken from schizophrenia.com]:

Schizophrenia is characterized by a constellation of distinctive and predictable symptoms. The symptoms that are most commonly associated with the disease are called positive symptoms, that denote the presence of grossly abnormal behavior. These include thought disorder, delusions, and hallucinations. Thought disorder is the diminished ability to think clearly and logically. Often it is manifested by disconnected and nonsensical language that renders the person with schizophrenia incapable of participating in conversation, contributing to his alienation from his family, friends, and society. Delusions are common among individuals with schizophrenia. An affected person may believe that he is being conspired against (called "paranoid delusion"). "Broadcasting" describes a type of delusion in which the individual with this illness believes that his thoughts can be heard by others. Hallucinations can be heard, seen, or even felt; most often they take the form of voices heard only by the afflicted person. Such voices may describe the person's actions, warn him of danger or tell him what to do. At times the individual may hear several voices carrying on a conversation. Less obvious than the "positive symptoms" but equally serious are the deficit or negative symptoms that represent the absence of normal behavior. These include flat or blunted affect (i.e. lack of emotional expression), apathy, and social withdrawal).

While schizophrenia can affect anyone at any point in life, it is somewhat more common in those persons who are genetically predisposed to the disease. The first psychotic episode generally occurs in late adolescence or early adulthood. Three-quarters of persons with schizophrenia develop the disease between 16 and 25 years of age. In the 16-25 year old age group, schizophrenia affects more men than women.

If you read through the past entries of the Lewis Log, you will soon see similarities between a classic case of schizophrenia and Lewis's behavior. I hope that Lewis can understand that he has a problem. I think that he will get nowhere in life until he realizes this and gets treatment. Deep inside Lewis i'm sure there is a good person.

One of the biggest stories in Lewis Log history. It is my great honor to present,

"Invaders from Beyond"
by John

So the other night, Brian and Michael had already gone to bed. It's about 1:30am and KABAM, Lewis frantically enters the room, turns on the faucet (apparently he had to make a phone call), and slams his door. In a few minutes, he runs over to my room and says "I just fuckin' saw a UFO! No joke!"He goes on to tell me that he just called the Marshall Space Flight Center to inform them of his sighting, but that they didn't believe him. And he actually gave them his real phone number and name. "That's how fucking sure I am about this." I finally asked him what exactly he saw. Here's his description as well as I can remember it: The ship itself was orange. Somewhere between the color orange and peach actually. He then asked me if I knew what Jupiter looked like in the sky. He described it as a star that's bigger than the rest in the sky. The ship was the size of about 20 Jupiters, or one quarter the size of the moon. Then, in a sudden realization he told me that this ship was not moving in a straight line across the sky, and that there was a small thing that looked like a star tethered to the ship in front of it. And this small star was pulling the orange to peach colored ship in a jerky motion across the sky. This long description with the short statement: "It scared me. I ran." No more words are needed to tell this story. Lewis ran. That must mean something crazy was going down.

Just when all hope disappeared. Lewis returned...

"The Rules"
by Michael

Well, John and Me are complete and utter assholes. That's right. Lewis came in tonight and messed with the temperature. If he does not get our permission first, it is a violation of our room contract Article 1 section 3. We have had enough of his temperature changing, since it is not summer anymore and it has been rainy and cold. And walking into a 68 degree room when it has been cold and rainy is no fun. So, I cut out the portion of the contract mentioning the temperature and taped it above the thermostat. I had no clue what would happen, but I knew I was 'planting the seed' of conflict!

The door opens. Lewis apparently notices the sign and tells John, whose door is closed and locked, "You can stop playing grabass now" To which John replies, from behind his door, "grabass? it's just fucking cold in here. dude, it's not summer anymore. we don't want it at 65 degrees." Lewis quickly replies that it was between the agreed upon temperature range. Someone didn't read their contract! John tells Lewis that he is wrong, and Lewis tries to argue his point. Then John starts reading Article 1 section 3 out loud, from behind his locked door. No response from Lewis. He leaves shortly thereafter. VICTORY!

By the way, be sure to check out the fan art section. Greg from Indiana made an awesome series of Lewis art. It's HOT!

Well, the man has not showed up so we can't post very much. Brian is lucky enough to be in the same calculus class as Lewis and reports that he did not show up today. What is he up to? Lord only knows.

Added some more fan art, and posted the T-Shirt voting page. Check it out.

Don't forget to sign up for a preorder of the official Lewis Log T-Shirts! If you want one, post a comment here: See the previous entry for the design and more information.

"The Plunger Present"
by Brian

So, Lewis has left his festering poo in the toilet for a week and a half. After asking him to do something about it, and not seeing any results, I had enough. I went out and bought a plunger to set by his door. On my way out I saw a present bow, so I bought it too. The plunger with attached bow sat in front of his door all weekend. Monday Lewis showed up...

"You mean they still haven't fixed this toilet yet?" "No Lewis, they haven't, I don't think that is one of the jobs they do, we tried to tell you that." "Well, every indication I received said that they were going to fix this situation." (situation?) "Oh look, someone bought me a present. And it even has a bow on it! Did all of you buy this for me?" "No Lewis, I think Brian bought it himself" "Well I think you all chipped in on this one" (Why can't he ever just believe someone? Which reminds me, guys you still owe me a dollar each.) [editor - eat it, brian.]

Anyway, so at least now John's toilet is usable again, and he doesn't have to live with Lewis's poo. But we still have to live with Lewis...

Made a few updates, be sure to check out the old website in the archives section!

• Made it so all pictures can be enlarged
• Added fan art section
• Added old archives
• Corrected grammatical errors

Also of interest to a lot of you may be Lewis Log T-Shirts. The shirts will end up looking something like the image you see to your right. The reason for the design is to be kind of anonymous, but still display the message. We surely couldn't put "Lewis Log" on them anywhere! Anywho, we are not sure how much the shirts will cost, but will probably end up somewhere in the $15 - $20 range. If you are interested, please post a comment here:

Welcome back to version 2.0 of the ever-so-popular lewis log. Why is it back you may ask? Because I finally realized that I don't care anymore. If he does discover this site, he'll get mad, maybe try to press legal charges, but I can't be sued for libel because this is an exact representation of what he is. We don't make this up.

"I can't stand this poster any longer"
by Michael

So I was walking into our room and I noticed Lewis taking down my beloved Chicken Run movie poster. When I asked him why he was taking down my poster, he said "I can't look at this poster any more. I just can't take it. It has to come down." I replied "OK, but don't you think that this would be a group decision since it is in the middle room?" To which Lewis informed me that the poster had to come down. Lewis also preceeded to ask me why I made a 'big deal' out of everything. Hmm, big deal, eh? Well I wasn't going to sit there and do nothing. So I decided that I needed something to get back at him. Something odd, something unexpected... So, after a quick trip to WalMart, Brian and I returned with 1400 post-it notes. We then covered the whole wall. It only took about an hour. And Lewis's response? Not much, actually he was actually intrigued by the idea. And he better not even think about taking them down. That would be war.

"This is not Georgia Tech"
by Brian

A while back, Lewis had clogged the toilet by using paper towels. He showed up again later this evening. After fussing about the tolet again, he asked if John has done anything about getting it fixed. I told lewis that it was not John's responsibility. Lewis got real mad:
"Don't you even think that I don't know how to unclog a toilet. I just thought maintenance was going to fix it. I can't believe you guys haven't done something about this yet."
To which I responded:
"Then why don't you fix it. It's not like Georgia Tech here. It is your toilet, not a floor's toilet. It is your responsibility, not maintenance's."

(He ran to his room for a few minutes then came back)

"Look man, i wish that you would just deal with your problems with me directly, instead of through little things like the toilet. You have a problem with me because i went to Georgia Tech and you didn't. Why can't you just accept that?"
"Lewis I don't have a problem with you because you went to Georgia Tech, I was just comparing the two different stlyes of dorms.
"What do you know about Georgia Tech?"
"I have visited the dorms and campus several times."
"Face it, I know more about Georgia Tech then you do. And I have lived in several dorms."
"Did you ever live in a suite?"
"No, but you don't have to hate me because I went to Georgia Tech. I don't have time for this."
(lewis runs out of room, slams door, then locks it)

That is it for today. Stay tuned for more hardcore LEWIS action!