Top 47 Things You'll Never Hear God Say:

The credit for all of these belongs to Roger and his lack of sleep back in March of 2001.

47. "Go fish!"
46. "My dog ate My homework."
45. "Man, these Speedos are riding up My ass."
44. "I've fallen and I can't get up!"
43. [eagerly] "...and then what happened?"
42. "Shotgun!"
41. [singing] "Do a little dance, make a little love, get down tonight!"
40. "Cleanup in aisle seven!"
39. "Pull over, I need to ask for directions."
38. "Cannonball!"
37. "I'm older than dirt."
36. [smacking his forehead] "I coulda had a V8."
35. "BINGO!"
34. [responding to hostess] "Smoking."
33. "Are We there yet?"
32. "Shut yer pie-hole."
31. "Close the door, son. What were you, born in a barn?"
30 "Of COURSE I'll still respect you in the morning!"
29. "I have no idea."
28. "Pull my finger."
27. Whoa, I didn't see THAT coming.
26. "Nyah-nyah-nyah-nyah-nyaaaaahhhh-nyah."
25. "Hey sailor, new in port?"
24. I should've thought of that.
23. [singing in the shower] "It's the end of the world as we know it, and I feel fine."
22. "BOO!"
21. "Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned..."
20. "I forgot."
19. "Well, you're going to have to tell Me. I'm not a mind-reader, you know."
18. "You sank My Battleship!"
17. [to Jesus] "I shall call him...Mini-Me."
16. "Do these jeans make My hips look big?"
15. "Mr. Magee, don't make Me angry...you wouldn't like Me when I'm angry."
14. "You want fries with that?"
13. "Look, there are so many hours in a day. I can't be EVERYWHERE at once."
12. "Oops, My bad."
11. "Paper or plastic?"
10. "Luke...I am your father."
9. "Man, My feet are KILLING Me."
8. "Don't make Me get up!"
7. "Uno!"
6. "Because I said so, THAT'S why!"
5. "Who da man?"
4. "This job sucks."
3. "I fold."
2. "Hey, gimme the remote back! I was watching Springer!"

And the #1 thing you'll never hear God say:

1. "When I was your age..."