Life At Roanoke:
Or, how NVLD affected my life
My College Memoirs--September 1991 through May 1995
Copyright 2006
Synopsis: My memoirs are full of good memories, but also reflect 4 years of dealing with a little-known learning disorder, without the benefit of knowing I had it. It has caused difficulties. But it also gave me certain abilities which helped with my writing and later jobs. These memoirs are meant to entertain, to help young women avoid making the relationship mistakes I made, and to show how I finally came through my relationship struggles triumphant. Also note that while I still struggle with many things because of NVLD, I graduated college and have made a decent life for myself--the roots of which are in my college story.
(To eventually be published in book form. But for now, I'm still tweaking the online version.)
(Disclaimer: These memoirs are from my point of view. The points of view of other people may differ. Whether or not mine is correct is subjective. It's also probably safe to assume that most, if not all, of the people in these memoirs who did something that hurt me would act differently in the same situation today. I keep the details of bad things here not to hold onto hurts, but to make the story complete, and to help others who may be going through a similar situation and don't know what to do. These memoirs are basically for the amusement of my friends, some of whom have lived through these events.)
History of these memoirs: I began writing detailed diaries and letters to friends in 1991. At first, these "diaries" were mostly notes written into my day planner to record special moments with my boyfriend, Peter, such as details of the Link (explained in my memoirs) and things he told me. In 1992, I was given a diary for Christmas, and began filling it with accounts of my troubles, since I was going through a difficult time. Soon, I filled that up and began using notebooks, filling several notebooks and diaries by the time I graduated in 1995. These diaries were like any diary: a mix of good and bad experiences. In 1992 or 1993, I typed my freshman year day planner into my word processor to preserve it, in case of fire. I included more details that came to mind. In early 1994, I began making notes for novels based on my own experiences, because I felt that nobody was capturing the kind of college experiences I and my friends were having. The closest thing to that was the TV series Class of '96, which was criticized as being unrealistic, and soon canceled. Yet that show came closer to my reality than any other show or movie I had yet seen. In late 1994 or early 1995, I began putting my experiences into a semi-fictionalized form for future publication, but the events of senior year put them on the backburner. As I began my first job as an insurance clerk, I also began working again on my memoirs, putting them into fictional form as a series of dialogues between the protagonist and a wise, older friend. Yes, this was much like Felicity's tapes sent to a dear friend, in the first season of Felicity--only this was 1995 and 1996, a few years before anybody ever heard of Felicity Porter. So I had the idea first. Nyah. I could change events as I wished, having my protagonist do what I wished I had done. But first, I would write down the truth, to be fictionalized later. In the meantime, I still wrote entries from the point of view of my protagonist's friend, which basically were my own, wiser view a few years after the events.
Because of my job, I couldn't go very fast on the memoirs, doing most of my writing--of the memoirs and of fictional works--on weekends and vacations. In 1998, I was downsized and became a housewife; during that time, I made lots of progress. However, I also read an article about libel, and feared I couldn't publish my fictionalized version without being subject to libel suits. I kept writing the true accounts for my own use, but no longer intended to fictionalize them in a novel. Instead, they would be my journal of college.
In 2001, I neared completion of the accounts of freshman year (I had started working backwards because the horrid events involving Phil were fresh in my mind and needed to be dealt with immediately). Friends from college kept saying, "I want to read your memoirs!" But how was that possible, when they filled two fireproof vaults, and much of them were actually letters and personal diaries? It was for my own use, so it was not made into an easily accessible form for anyone else to read without going to my house. It was also full of private details. So I decided to clip and paste bits of my journals, sometimes including copies of diary entries and letters, into e-mails sent to all those who wanted to read my memoirs. This e-mailing began right before 9/11, and was kept up twice a week for quite some time.
In the years following, I kept the e-mails, and sent them to anyone new who wanted to see them. But this was impractical because there were so many e-mails to send at one time. In April 2006, I discovered Myspace. On my Myspace blog, I started posting things I had written in the past, such as travelogues. I also posted them on this website in case Myspace crashed. Then I began posting my memoirs--risky, because strangers could read them. I expanded and edited them as I went. I put a copy of each blog below, calling them the Archives. Which means even more people could read them. It's risky, but if I didn't want anyone to read them, why did I spend so much of my life writing them? At last, the story is out. And yes, this is the true version, not at all fictional. Eventually, I hope to also include memoirs of my childhood and possibly adulthood.
Index:
Freshman Year
May 1992--Year-End Parties; Summer Begins
Sophomore Year
Junior Year
January 1994--He Can't Decide Between the Girl he Wants and the Girl he Doesn't
March 1994--Controversial Play (Uncommon Women) and Emotional Manipulation
April 1994--Engagement and a Huge Mistake: A Clandestine Marriage
May 1994--Phil's Nervous Breakdown and our Flight
Senior Year
January 1995--Celtic Roots Class, SCA and Hooking up to the Internet
March 1995--Phil Finds TCB; Gypsy's Party; TCB Flame Wars; First SCA Event