My buddy Doug and I first met while working in a Steel Mill.  He was the Plate Mill Assistant Superintendent, and I was a Roll Sheet Writer.  We were aggressive young men trying to climb the managerial ladder.  Of course, before long they found out what we really were: semi-educated rednecks and ornery at that.  Neither of us were very good at telling executives what they wanted to hear.  Doug in particular had a knack for telling the truth.  Throughout the years I known and worked with Doug, he's always had a phrase instantly available to explain whatever incident in life befell us.  Always from the  practical and direct point of view of country folks that worked all their lives to get by; and usually in the redneck vernacular.  These are a few of the most memorable observations he contributed and a little about the occasions that inspired them.