September 2, 2000
Texas Exes: Former Rangers Dominate Fantasy World
NATIONAL PAST-TIME ... Since the 59-75 Rangers have now tied for the
worst record in the AL, it’s time to consider "what might have been"
... you could stock a winning fantasy roster with ex-Rangers. Of
course, that’s true with many teams; imagine the Alumni Expos
starting their rotation with a pair of aces named Pedro and Randy.
And some players cancel each other out; Fernando Tatis was traded
for Todd Stottlemyre, and now neither is in Arlington. But for the
sake of argument -- this is *fantasy* baseball, after all -- here
are the "Texas Exes," a team made up of players who once appeared in
major league games with the Rangers.
Tearing it Up
WHAT A ROTATION! ... What manager wouldn't like to front his staff
with All-Stars Kevin Brown (12-5, 2.71), Ryan Dempster (11-9, 3.74),
and Aaron Sele (13-10, 4.96), then follow them with unsung Gil
Heredia (13-9, 4.37) and steady Wilson Alvarez (9-9, 4.22)? If any
injury problems occur, just plug in vets Jamie Moyer (11-8, 5.66) or
Stottlemyre (8-5, 4.24), enigmatic Esteban Loaiza (8-9, 5.11), or
old pro John Burkett (8-5, 4.84). For emergencies, there's Rockie
Brian Bohanon (8-9, 5.25) and 30-year-old Marlin rookie Chuck Smith
(3-5, 3.55). That’s 11 Texas Exes with a combined 104 wins.
Slumping
WEAK UP THE MIDDLE ... Catcher is hardly a problem for the "real"
Rangers, but our Texas Exes are stuck with statistical lookalikes
Gregg Zaun (.251/5 HR) and Chad Kreuter (.268/5 HR); Mike Stanley
(.230/12/38) would be a minor upgrade, but he hasn't caught since
1997. Mark McLemore has some fantasy value at 2B with 26 SB, while
SS Kevin Elster has 12 dingers in just over 200 at-bats. Spares Jeff
Frye (.286) and Benji Gil (10 SB) are also around. This team would
obviously rather have Pudge in shinguards, but it might also help
current Ranger fans appreciate the Clayton-Catalanotto-Alicea era.
At the Plate
POWER COMPANY ... The outfield and infield corners are awesome.
Let's start Sammy Sosa (.316/45/123), Tom Goodwin (43 SB) and
versatile David Segui (.340/15/79) in the OF, and go with Cardinals
Will Clark (a white-hot .385/8/19 in 96 AB) and Tatis (.277/15/54 in
just 238 AB) at the corners. Or maybe Tiger Dean Palmer (.264/26/88)
should play 3B? Useful 1B/3B Todd Zeile (.283/17/70) and 1B Lee
Stevens (.267/22/74) are available on the bench, while DHs Jose
Canseco and Harold Baines have combined for .259/24/79. Should we
even bother mentioning Juan Gonzalez (.302/19/61)?
Probable Starters
Sept. 4, D. Davis @ CHI (AL)
Sept. 5, D. Oliver @ CHI (AL)
Sept. 6, R. Helling @ CHI (AL)
Sept. 7, K. Rogers @ CHI (AL)
Sept. 8, R. Glynn @ KC
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From the Rubber
KILLER 'PEN ... Let's start -- or, rather, finish -- with arguably
the best closer in the game, San Francisco's Robb Nen; the ex-Ranger
is 3-3 with 32 saves, a 1.58 ERA and 70 K in 51.1 IP. Getting to Nen
is no problem, as righties Mike Morgan (5-3), Tanyon Sturtze (5-2),
Todd Van Poppel (3.06), Danny Patterson (3.14) and Mark Petkovsek
(4-2) have combined with lefties Mike Stanton (65 career saves) and
Ed Vosberg (3.72) for a 24-14 record and vultured eight saves.
Mop-up duties go to righty Julio Santana (0-4, 4.79) and lefty
retread Jeff Fassero, 8-8 as a starter before being moved to the Red
Sox 'pen.
Recent Call-ups
CALLING THE SHOTS ... Need someone to manage these fantasy Texas
Exes? Eliminate former Ranger skipper Kevin Kennedy, since he might
confuse Canseco with a relief pitcher again, but former Texas boss
Bobby Valentine has his Mets in first place. Former Ranger players
Mike Hargrove, Jim Fregosi and Buddy Bell are also all managing in
the big leagues. In the unlikely event that this team would need
instruction, Detroit hitting coach Bill Madlock is a former Ranger
batting champion, while we can go off the board a little to hire
Giants pitching coach Dave Righetti, the former Texas super-prospect
traded for Sparky Lyle back in 1978.
